About Janet

I'm a 41 year old mother of triplet girls, who are the centre of my universe. I'm an active, busy person: I commute, work full time, regularly run & am learning the piano. Life has been good. I've recently been devastated by my husband's diagnosis of an astrocytoma glioma - an invasive brain tumour that there is no cure for. This blog is Fergus's story, told from my viewpoint.

Flying Solo

Posted on December 4, 2013 by Janet

Help!

Due to another Nepali Admin saga that is just too long and dull to type out, I am in Sauraha with the 3 rug-rats while Fergus has had to go on a 3 day mission to Kathmandu to get a parcel of goodies that we’ve had sent to us.

Now, I know that in the not too distant past I used to be able to look after all my children on my own with no issues, so I’m not sure why I feel so nervous about it!

Maybe it’s having Scarlett on crutches; maybe it’s being in a foreign land; maybe it’s that we have 3 Daddy’s girls who hang on his every word; maybe it’s that I’ve just not had to do it for so long; but it feels like a big challenge.

Anyway, I sat them down and explained how we’d have to work as a team to make it fun while Daddy’s away, and how we have to do extra good behavior. I was asked in turn to also do extra good behavior and not be strict or shout. So we have a deal.

And the Dairy Milk and hour in an internet cafe with a computer each won’t hurt either.

So far, so good…!

Eggs & Baskets

Posted on December 2, 2013 by Janet

The challenge: get our 3 children, one of whom has a full leg plaster cast and was issued with crutches less than 24 hours ago, from Kathmandu to Chitwan on public transport.

It’s a fair challenge, I thought, but we are up the task. I bought an extra seat for Scarlett to rest her leg on, ‘borrowed’ a pillow from an overpriced hotel, and charged up all the i devices (made by St Apple, the patron saint of long journeys with kids).

It was all going so well, Scarlett was comfy and had my ipod shuffle playing Roald Dhal’s “The Witches” to her, while Evie and Jemima enjoyed sharing the normal ipod and playing the same tunes over and over again and shouting at each other to try to communicate with their headphones still on, in a rather endearing fashion.

Ferg was lost in some game on the ipad, while I just stared out of the window and thought how nice it was to have a quiet moment.

We stopped at some services, and negotiated the challenge of taking Scarlett down some slippery, wet, uneven steps to a ‘squatty potty’ style toilet, which I’m sure you’ll agree was quite an achievement. All good so far.

We had a bite to eat, and set off again.

Refreshed from our rest stop, no one reached immediately for the i-devices. We chatted and settled back down again. It was Fergus who noticed first, reaching for the ipad he said, “Where is the black bag?”

I knew immediately where it was. On the floor, under a chair, in the service station.

Containing: 1 Macbook Air (£900) with all our photos and countless other data stored on the hard drive; 1 ipad (£400); 1 ipod (£200); 1 ipod shuffle (£40); 3 kindles (£220) and worst of all, our hard copies of Scarlett’s medical file including her X ray photos needed for our follow up appointments for her broken leg.

I knocked frantically on the glass door separating the driver and his ‘right hand man’ from the passengers, and used a well placed helpful English speaking Nepali man to help convey the problem. Well, I may have complained about Nepalese inefficiency in the past, but believe me, when I needed things to move fast, they moved fast!

The bus screeched to halt, a phone call was made and next thing Ferg was being pulled along by the Coach Man, who hurled himself in front of the first lorry coming the other way and bundled the pair of them into it! I waited with the children on the bus, looking rather ashamed of myself and apologising to the other passengers. The last thing you need on an 8 hour journey is some stupid person holding everyone up for an hour to go back for a bag.

It sounds as though Ferg had an interesting time hitching to the services and back Nepali style, hanging out of the sides of various vehicles and being dragged along by the only high-speed Nepali I’ve ever met. It must have been a dark moment when the service station staff proudly produced a different black bag.

But fortunately, they had two black bags, and ours was soon returned to us, and Fergus in turn returned to his family unharmed.

All part of the adventure, but a lesson in putting eggs in baskets, or rather a lesson in putting eggs in baskets and leaving the said basket behind.

Admin, Nepali Style

Posted on December 1, 2013 by Janet

I can’t tell you how long it takes to get anything done here. Things that you take for granted at home turn into the most convoluted, complex, painful and agonising experiences when you try to do them in Nepal.

Take, for example, the task of sending a signed medical ‘fit to fly’ form to an airline for a girl with a broken leg. In England, this would be a bit of a hassle, maybe needing to find a scanner and scan in the signed form would take a while, but then the sending of the email would be simple, right?

Not exactly, no!

First, you have to print the blank form. This means downloading it with super-slow network connections from the airline’s website (1 hour). Then, you have to save it to a pen drive (10 mins). Next, find an internet café where you can print (easy – 5 mins). Then print. Ah, of course, the computers in the internet café are not connected to the printer. The man who knows how to connect them is out. Not sure when he’s back. Try another internet café? OK, we now have printers that connect to the PC’s, but the Windows version is so old it doesn’t recognise the files on the pen drive. Take pen drive back to our guest house and reformat the files on our laptop. You get the picture. Day 1 is all about printing the blank form.

Day 2 is about scanning in the completed form. This is relatively simple, only 2 internet cafes and 2 hours were involved.

I then have to send it to the airline. Check airline website to find the right email address. Ah. The medical department doesn’t have an email address, just a fax number. OK, can the cybercafé fax? Yes! Hooray! Try to fax, but sadly the fax number doesn’t work. So I try to call. No answer. Hmmmmm. OK, I email the customer services of the airline to ask if they can provide an email address or a fax number that I can use to send the medical form. End of day 2.

Day 3, any replies? Joy! A reply! The high is quickly replaced by disappointment as I read (and I literally quote this):-

“We regret to inform you it is not possible for us to confirm the travel trough mail. We request you kindly contact with any of your Airport Air India counter with your form copy and photo ID proof. They do the needful in this regards.”

I assume this means I have to go the airport Air India Counter with the medical form. Surely not? And I can’t risk buying $2000 tickets and then just turning up at the counter, the website clearly says we need clearance to fly 14 days before we fly. And we are a day’s journey from the nearest Air India Desk. I exchange a few emails with this person, asking if they can check the fax number, or check if the medical office has a working phone number or an email address. They helpfully reply quickly, but with the same message.

“This is to acknowledge your mail, we regret to inform you no email ID for the same.”

OK, try a new airline.

I try sending the completed form to a couple of other airlines, again using their customer services offices as none of the medical offices seem to have email addresses. I have to chop the form into 4 separate documents as the file size is too big to send all these emails with the super-slow connection. This takes most of Day 4.

Day 5, I have a couple of replies that tell me the correct email addresses to send the medical forms to. Others have alternative versions of the forms that I need to download, fill in, scan in and then send. Others don’t reply at all.

I feel a bit like that fish in Finding Nemo, “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swim, swim, swim, swim, swimming!”

Finally, on day 6, I get a response from Jet Airways telling me they will authorize Scarlett to fly on our chosen route! Victory! I log on and find the tickets I’ve been checking every day. They are sold out. Seriously! They are. They have some Economy Plus seats for about £500 more. I think, great, whatever, let’s just do it; and fill in all the online little boxes ready to buy. I get to the checkout and have to use a credit card, they don’t take debit. I rarely use my credit card so of course…it is declined. Such a large transaction in rupees looks odd to the bank.

So off I go, back to the internet café where I make an international call to the bank. I am put through to 3 different people, who all need the same data repeating (I have now shouted my credit card number including the security no’s on the back, by date of birth and mother’s maiden name, as loud as I can to a roomful of people 3 times over, all of whom are online, probably now purchasing their own flights with my card details, all so that my bank can protect me from credit card fraud). They have blocked the transaction and can’t unblock it for another 7 mins, can I call back? I agree as I am given a direct dial to the person I’m speaking to.

I call back. The phone doesn’t work. The man who owns the café can’t get it to work. Pay up and move on to another place.

I call again. It rings. When someone answers, it’s a caravan sales place. Thanks for that direct number Mr Helpful Call Centre Guy. So it’s back to the automated menu and shouting my credit card details to another roomful of tourists. I’m put on hold. 10 mins later a supervisor asks further security questions. On hold again. It’s OK, I’m only speding £1 a minuite on this, take your time. I eventually get my card unblocked and hurry back to book the tickets.

Which are all sold out.

Even Economy plus.

I cry.

I check for the day before…sold out. And for all the days before that…sold out or ridiculously priced. The day after? It means overstaying our Nepali Visas? Ah ha – there are tickets, the same route, a good price. I don’t know if the medical clearance will be valid, but a quick google tells me the Visas can be extended by paying about $33 at the airport, so not a problem.

I book them.

It all goes through and I have etickets in my inbox.

Victory.

We are going to Thailand for Christmas!

(As long as I can get our medical clearance moved to the following day, get our Thai Visas on time and get our Nepalese Visas extended. Should be simple, right?)

Turning Nepalese

Posted on November 30, 2013 by Janet

I have been in Nepal for a while now. I can feel my English habits and expectations slipping away and being replaced by new, more reserved, more, well, Nepalese, counterparts.

It’s little things. I find myself lowering my eyes away from Western women in vest tops as though this is shameful attire (it’s considered underwear here); I can’t hand money over without holding my elbow with the other hand; and I automatically put my hands into the prayer position to say ‘thank you’ or ‘sorry’.

And I’m slowing down. I no longer expect internet access to work first time. Or second time. Or at all. Electricity is a bonus.

I look forward to my daily portion of lentils and rice, I balk at paying tourist prices in restaurants, preferring to eat lunch each day from the same street vendor for 50NPR (about 30p, although I do realise she is still charging me a tourist price, it’s 20NPR for locals)! It’s an interesting dish, a mish-mash of pulses, dried noodles and boiled potatoes flavoured with chillie, coriander, fish sauce and various other yet-to-be-identified spices; served on a sheet of newspaper with a little homemade cardboard spoon. Delicious.

I’m even picking up the body language, Ferg asked me if I wanted to order anything off a menu and I responded by wobbling my head from side the side, the definitive Nepalese gesture, which I seems to mean anything from “OK” to, “Whatever”, to “I might have understood you or I might not.”

Anyway, got to go, I’m off to go and fetch some firewood in a bamboo backpack and carry some water on my head. Or maybe there’s still a bit of English left in me yet.

A Big Surprise

Posted on November 25, 2013 by Janet

by Evie

Travelling is not going the way we planned, mainly because Tettie broke her leg so we had to finish our trek with a sudden and exciting helicopter ride which included amazing views, a lot of bumps and took us to Kathmandu instead of Pokhara. This news was annoying however it meant that we could go to Chitwan where it is relaxed, flat, fun, comfortable and is extremely beautiful. All of these things are very good for someone with a broken leg who doesn’t know how to use crutches.

It’s very weird with Tettie on crutches because you can’t go anywhere without a grown up (Mummy or Daddy). It changes a lot of things including running around, climbing, playing. Though it does not stop the fun of Chitwan. We can still play with her. For example she can tel us how good our handstands are. She quite liked doing that. I wonder if she could do a handstand or if her leg would be too heavy. We are working hard on our handstands and there is a squashed mushroom in the garden which Jemima keeps sitting on (that’s how it got squashed!).

Tettie can still play chess. She’ll probably get good at chess; almost as good as Daddy. We can also play Dungeons and Dragons which is an amazing role playing game which doesn’t weight much. However, I like Mice and Mystics more. You can do this game without running around.

It tastes nice here, meaning that the food here is good, the air is good, the fun is good, the trees are good, the flowers are good and the room is good.

Mummy and Daddy are feeling sad that Tettie has a broken leg but happy that we are in Chitwan National Park.

Road Kill

Posted on November 24, 2013 by Janet

I just witnessed a near miss on the road outside our guest house between 2 elephants, a motorbike and a horse and carriage. The squealing of tyres, the trumpeting of the elephants and the neighing if the horse brought everyone onto the street. No one was injured, but it did make me wonder what kind of road kill they get here, and might explain that chewy spaghetti bolognaise I ordered the other night…

Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

Posted on November 17, 2013 by Janet

To say the last few days have been a whirlwind is putting it lightly. No one expects to actually use their travel insurance, especially not the dramatic ‘helicopter rescue for emergency medical treatment’ section.

But here we are, in a hospital room that will be permanently etched upon my brain (and no doubt Scarlett’s too, the length of time she’ll be lying still in here, poor thing), reading through policy documents and working out the pro’s and con’s of the options the insurance company have given us.

We are lucky enough to have a choice. The initial response was that we had to all fly home and end the trip. However, they have now agreed that we can continue with the trip and they will cover Scarlett’s treatment on the condition that we stay in Nepal and use the same team of doctors that she is with now. If we move on to a new country, we have to take responsibility for the cost of Scarlett’s treatment, which means we would realistically have to be here until early January when she moves from a full leg cast to a half leg cast and has various scans and x rays to check it is healing properly. After that, there would be no scheduled appointments except for the final removal of the cast after a further 6 weeks (mid Feb), which would be fairly cheap to pay for privately, so we could move on to Thailand in early January.

Alternatively, we can all fly home in about 3 weeks time when she is fit to travel. This would mean we could get the cast changed and all the scans etc in the UK, with a plan to basically set off again in early January. This would mean buying a new insurance policy (which of course would exclude any cover for Scarlett’s treatment, so again we’d be paying for the cast removal in Thailand). And of course, paying for flights for all 5 of us from the UK to Thailand.

We are currently leaning towards coming home, but it’s a tough decision and I’m not sure we are in quite the right frame of mind to make it just now.

My thoughts today on coming home are:

Good Things:

The NHS and the safety of knowing that Scarlett will get whatever she needs, medically
I think Scarlett would be better entertained in the UK as there’s not a lot to do in Nepal on crutches – lots of steps, uneven pavements etc. In the UK we could take her out for a drive and there’s always disabled access to places. Plus those mobility scooters you can hire – she’d have a field day on one of those!
We’d be home for Christmas, which we’d all really enjoy
We’ll save about £200 in postage as we were planning to send a suitcase of trekking equipment home which we could just take with us
Catching up with family and friends
We are lucky enough to have already had offers of places to stay (as our house is rented out)
The girls could see Marmalade, our cat

Bad Things:

It breaks up the trip which none of our children want – they feel very insecure about flying home
It costs about £2,000 more than the option of staying (new insurance and extra flights)
Risk of blowing a lot of our travel money while in the UK on things like petrol and food…our budgets are based on third world prices
We have no winter clothes!
I have a strange fear that we will somehow get stuck and not be able to set off again – irrational I know but I can’t help it

The main things I’ve always wanted to get out of this trip though are for us all to spend a year together as a family without the distractions of work, the drudgery of housework and the chaos of modern life. So whatever we decide to do, as long as I can focus all my attention of being there for my family and enjoying our time together, I don’t think it matters too much where in the world we end up.

Our Routine in Sauhara, Chitwan

Posted on October 22, 2013 by Janet

NOTE: All times are approximate.

07.00 Wake up

07.15 Yoga

08.00 Showers, dressing, maybe a quick game of Smallworld, breakfast on the verandah

09.00 “Jungle School” (maths puzzles, spellings, project on Nepal, learning to make a website, creative writing)

11.00 Playtime at the river & elephant bathtime

12.00 “Jungle School” & snacks from the guest house menu

15.00 Playtime on the giant bamboo swing or feeding the resident elephant with bananas

16.00 Diary Time

17.30 Big Meal at KC’s (not to be confused with KFC, a totally different experience)

19.00 Bedtime stories, into nighties and into bed

19.30 Lights off

20.00 Chill out time for mum and dad

And another day is done…

Jemima (blue top), Scarlett (red top) and Evie (purple top) working on spellings outside our guest house, then later playing with the baby elephant who lives at the bottom of the garden.

The Cost of Visiting the Poorest Country in the World

Posted on October 19, 2013 by Janet

So, we have just spent 4 whole days in Kathmandu to get our India Visas. We have struggled through a complex bureaucratic process, all while negotiating the Nepali equivalent of Christmas.

Specifically: non-standard sized photographs that needed to be taken; photocopies of various documents that had to be made; an online form that had to be filled in by a man who could only use the ‘search and peck’ method of typing (x 5 forms – this was painful, how I wanted to snatch the keyboard from him… arghhh!); and all the associated queues that needed to be waited in to obtain this precious list of compulsory items.

We arrived at the Embassy an hour before opening time, joined the already long queue, received a chitty with our number on (handwritten – the machine was broken), waited our turn, got to the front of the queue (number called out by a security guard – the display was broken), had the forms checked (all correct – yes!) and were asked for payment.

Ah.

When researching the trip in the UK, the price was £30 each. And there was a discount for children. However, things have changed, and the price is now almost £100 each with no discount for children. So we needed almost £500, an amount that with local ATM daily limits being very low would take us 3 days to withdraw, and that we simply didn’t have on us.

So, still trying to smile and answer the kids questions (What’s going on Mummy? Are we still going to India?), we retired to a café to weigh up our options.

Given that we were only planning to spend 3 weeks or so in India, and the main activity was travelling from North to South by train, it turns out it’s cheaper for us to cancel our flight from the South of India to Sri Lanka and buy a new one from Kathmandu to Sri Lanka than it is to pay for the Visas.

So, we think, this is the new plan. The challenge now is cancelling the flights. We have spoken to the call centre, cancelling them is no problem, but we have to pick up the cash refund at a desk in… you guessed it… India! Still working on getting the refund back onto the card we paid on. We may be some time…

There and Back Again

Posted on October 10, 2013 by Janet

A 360-degree panorama from the top of Gokyo Ri

Sitting in a little internet cafe in Namche Bazaar, paying by the minute for the 1980’s style computer, I thought I’d just give you a few highs and lows of our first trip into the Himalayas. I’m the proudest mum in the World of three 8 year old girls who can now say that they have had breakfast at 5370m above sea level, looking out over the biggest mountains in the World, having walked for 10 days to get there.

We have overcome episodes of altitude sickness, episodes of what shall politely be called ‘traveller’s tummy’ and episodes of thinking we are crazy to be taking our children so far away from civilisation (as we know it). My personal battle with basically not having enough T shirts (or rather not having enough access to running water to cope with just 2 T-shirts) has been overcome by the rental of a simple en suite room in Namche. Never has a hot shower felt so good.

So, would I do it all again? Well, our plan is to walk the next 4 days back to Lukla, fly to Kathmandu, bus it to Pokara and… you guessed it (if you know Nepal)… trek the Annapurna region! I think we are hooked.

Travels with Triplets

(and Mum & Dad, too!)

Author Archives: Janet